Mad Abe's OneShot Theatre
by Madness Abe
Summary: A theater where I'll be releasing out one shots on various different animes, cartoons, video games, etc.  Rating varies by chapter.
1. Chapter 1

Mad Abe's One-Shot Theate

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><p>Introduction<p>

The theater was worn down after all the years it was built. But amazingly enough, it survived every kind of disaster that hit it from all the years it stood in the city. It had survived powerful storms, hail, car crashes, tornadoes, and even an attack by gangsters. Yet it was still standing here, as if it was undisturbed by anything. But even so, it was still worn down. The walls were crumbling, the paint peeling off, and wooden boards covered the doors and windows. Rust and moss covered the buildings as crows were flying over the theater, and the squeaks of mice could be heard from just a few feet away. No one would ever want to go inside, but one person was already going in...

The young man walked into the theater, through an opening big enough for an adult. If anyone was even outside, they'd be confused as to who would want to go in the condemned theater to begin with. But the man continued on, going to where a concession stand was once at. The popcorn machine and sodas were no longer there, now replaced with moss. However, a single table still stood and on that table was a large bag full of popcorn and a large soda. Both were freshly made, freshly served, and were just laid there as if someone would just be expected to take it. Needless to say, the man shrugged and grabbed them before going into one of the auditorium.

This was where things looked strange. The auditorium was untouched, as if it was newly built only yesterday. The seats were all clean and lights shone through the pathways. The screen was playing, albeit only showing a commercial for some kind of electronic. The man looked over to a group of people, each sitting and having refreshments. The man smiled and sat next to them.

"You left me some popcorn and a soda? How'd you guys know?" The man replied. The man next to him, wearing a purple shirt and glasses smiled and said, "Well this IS a theater, you know."

Another man, this one with a shirt featuring a man in a raccoon suit, glasses, and tanned skin gave out a small chuckle. The man with red spiky hair and a headband did the same.

Another man, this one with a black beret and military garbs gave a smirk. "What'd you expect, Abe? Expecting a fruit salad?"

Abe, the first man who entered through, gave a deadpan look. "Well, I'd have thought you guys would've made a whole buffet! You've been here for what? 2 hours?"

The green eyed man sighed in annoyance. "We can't exactly cook, you know."

"I know, DJ. Just like messing with you guys."

"So how long until the movie starts?" said another man in a white shirt and red tie. A larger man, who bizarrely resembles a tiger, nodded as well.

"Well, it should start any minute now. I mean, I could've sworn that I this is the right place. It's the right theater. It's the right auditorium and..."

Before he continued, the screen began to flicker as a countdown began.

10...9...8...7...

"Well, it's show time, men. Lets just see what's up next."

5...

_Madness Abe Presents..._

4...

_Only on this site_

3...

_Starring many, many, characters_

2..

_And with a few authors_

1.

_Madness Abe's One-shot Theater_

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><p>...Well, not so much as dramatic for a one-shot okay? But hopefully, the next ones are better.<p>

Review, please! :D

-Madness Abe


	2. Chapter 2

Mad Abe's One Shot Theatre

1: The Crossover Ships!

Ever since I discovered TV Tropes, I've been going on there for a very long time, often searching for many different types of tropes that I may not have ever seen, heard of, or ever noticed in much of the media. It was all fun…

Until now, that is…..

Yesterday, I discovered a page entitled as "Crossover Ship". Needless to say, I found it interesting enough. I mean, I am a sucker for these kinds of things, and yes, I may end up finding shippings that I may support. But this time, however, was not the case. Oh, I ended up finding some very bizarre strange couples here…

I cannot allow innocents to find these drug-induced fantasies and suffer the horrific consequences. This must be shown!

….Let's get on with it! But I will only be putting up some that I (and quite possible a few of my own friend's) have heard of in the media. Any other fandoms, will have to be searched by You. Without further delay…..

I skipped through most that I have never heard of until I found…

_-Light Yagami/ Lucy_

At the title, I decided to search for which Lucy it was. To my utmost horror, it was Lucy from Elfen Lied. I have heard of her…destructive murders and I was consequently shocked. Who would pair up a serial killer with…someone far worse? I decided to call over Mr. Yagami to my home to ask his opinions. He didn't seem interested, until I showed him the video. His appearance was quite grim, to say the least. I asked him if he was to kill her. His reply was a silent, but quite obvious "No". Obviously he was too terrified from what he saw, but I cut him some slack and offered him a soda.

I continued on until yet again I found my first yaoi couple…

_-Lelouch Lamperouge/ Light Yagami_

At this time, I was sick to my stomach. I know that the two are manipulative bastards, but who had the right idea to pair these guys up? So I called Lelouch over to find his own opinion. He didn't seem too disturbed, as he did say he had been paired with other men before. Light said the same thing. I offered them both to stay over to see more. I was quite worried that the two would team up in some heinous scheme. I quickly ignored it and returned to find…

_-Yourichi/Sakura art exists_

_-As does Kakashi/Yoruichi and Kakashi/Starfire_

I really had no idea what to make of it. I should point out that Yoruichi, despite looking young, is over 100 years old, being a Soul Reaper and all. Being paired with Sakura Haruno….quite the disturbing sight. However, Yoruichi X Kakashi seemed interesting enough…WHAT AM I THINKING? I need to be against it. Keep it out of your head…I decided against calling Kakashi. I felt his attraction towards "Make-Out Paradise" too be too dangerous if I were to tell him of this pairing. As for Kakashi X Starfire…Needless to say, I didn't want to think of it. But now onto the next couples…

Montage music began to play at that very moment.

_-GLaDOS/HAL _

The pairing of two machines was strange already. I really have never played Portal, but I was indifferent of this.

_-Harry Potter/Edward Cullen_

It was at here where I was simply disgusted. Who in their right mind paired up one of literature's greatest heroes with….a sparkling bland excuse for a vampire? This is sick! This is wrong! I'm just glad that Lelouch and Light sided with me. Their expressions told everything I needed.

_-Snape/Jesus_

…What?

_-Snape/Jesus_

…Oh my Lord. Where do I begin with this? How about…..WRONG! JUST PLAIN FREAKING WRONG!

Then I found after the release of Super Smash Bros Brawl, various pairings were made. Some were decent, but others were more disturbing. Here's just a small list:

_-Samus/Solid Snake_

_-Sonic/Mario _

_-Samus/Fox_

_-Link/Samus_

_-Kirby/Jigglypuff_

You may like some of these, but my opinion will be held from this. Well look at this…

_Jim Hawkins/Ariel_

Better tell Steel about this one, but back to the lists.

_Orochimaru/Voldemort/Medusa_

Oh my…I decided to take a risk and call over the three over this. Orochimaru and Voldemort soon began to argue over who apparently was much more likely to get a date. Medusa didn't bother to answer. She must've seen this too…

_-Naruto Uzumaki/Orihime Inuoe_

This one seemed only slightly strange, but I had to call over Naruto over to find his opinion. Naruto seemed only indifferent, until I told him she could cook. He seemed overjoyed there, and probably thought Orihime could make ramen. The poor boy didn't know what would happen if he visited her…

_Alucard/Abel Nightroad_

Well, I wonder how Master of the Boot would react to this couple.

_Haruhi Fujioka/Haruhi Suzimiya_

I really didn't know what to make of this. I absolutely cannot see it as a couple. Possibly as good friends, but I digress.

_Green Goblin/Harley Quinn _

Oh, I remember that from Marvel/DC! But what is that doing here?

_Edward Elric/Maka Albarn_

….No comment. But I sure would not be telling this to Spirit.

_Goku/Anne Frank _

Oh, You WILL NOT BE HERE! GET THE HELL OUT!

_-Sandy Cheeks/Shadow the Hedgehog_

Well how should I break this to E, and my other friends?

_-Candace Flynn/Squidward Tentacles_

Would this even count as SANE?

_-Rorschach /Hinata Hyuga_

I doubt even the guy would like this….

_-Katara/Sasuke Uchiha_

Oh, it's just like Zutara except…Sasuke's a complete pit stain.

_-Phoenix Wright/Samus_

Well, Dimentio, what do you say about THAT?

And then I found Rainbow Dash/Sonic the Hedgehog and Fluttershy/Spider-Man before I gave up.

What do I have to say about these strange and oh so bizarre crossover pairings? Well a few may be able to work out if written right, but otherwise I found too many pairings that will give me nightmares.

But, I will still visit to see if any I like are here….

DID I JUST SAY THAT?

I need the Brain Bleach now….

Also, why is there no Itachi/Kikyo…?

Well not my best one-shot, but this is just my opinions for this strange page.

Credit to E350 for inspiring me on this type of one-shot. (Sorry man, but no Dani/Timmy)

If you want to check out the TV Tropes page, be forewarned: /Main/CrossoverShip

Review please! :)


	3. Chapter 3

Mad Abe's One-Shot Theatre

Replies to Chapter 1…

**Evee9109: Thanks, sis! **

**Dimentio713: Really? I didn't know that. All I can cook is an omelet…**

**E350: Thanks! This was more meant as each one shot as a movie or short film. **

**Sgt. Reynol: Let's hope so…**

**Master of the Boot: Thanks, man! As for that, wait a bit, will ya?**

Chapter 2 replies…

**Evee9109: It was mean for comedy actually. And I did totally forget about Alex Russo/Lelouch Lamperouge actually. There's not that big a base for Sakura/Hitsugaya as far as I know, but still…**

**Gokiburi Prince: I knew that one actually, but I didn't think that many people knew about Regular Show. Still, thanks for pointing it out!**

**Dimentio713: I'm indifferent too. Is Rainbow Dash/Sonic really that bad? **

**E350: ….Religion is not pleased. But still, thanks!**

**TLSoulDude: I knew about Itachi/Azula anyway, but I didn't really want to put it in. Too lazy…Yeah, Rorschach, I feel for you too…**

**Master of the Boot: Well Light and Lelouch would kill each other, seeing how their views of the world they want greatly differs. Your friends' couple's are….interesting. And don't read the Snape and Jesus one. The Goku/Anne Frank one is from an infamous fanfic, known as Until the End of Time. If you want to read it, knock yourself out. Also, what's your opinion on Light Yagami paired with Lucy from Elfen Lied?**

3: A Trailer for something quite epic….

_In this city, no one is safe…._

A woman ran through an empty street, as rain poured through excessively through the street. Thunder rumbled throughout, as the shape of a tall man followed slowly. The woman looks back as the man approached quickly. The woman turned a corned and looked again, seeing nothing. She breathes a sigh of relief, but turns again and sees the man. She can only scream as he swings a blade at her.

_Not the innocent, not the guilty…_

A masked man holds a knife at a man, spitting out various threats and swears as he demands the man to give him money. Suddenly, a shape descends over him as a blade is stabbed through his back.

A crowd of police officers surround a body surrounded by a large sheet. A newspaper flies by before sticking onto a wall. The headline read:

_3__rd__ Murder! Unknown Killer strikes again_

One of the officers looks away from the body in disgust, as another covers up the body, with a grim look on his face. The lead officer can only watch as he tries to solve what was going on.

"What the hell did this?" he whispered under his breath.

_Fear thrives in this city_

"All citizens are told to be at home before sundown. If you are alone, we ask for you to seek shelter immediately. If you are armed…it's best to defend yourself if anything occurs." Said a news anchor with a fearful tone in his voice.

_In this darkest of times,_

_Strong men must arise…._

At the same murder scene, a door opens as the officers turn to see who is entering. Two tall men enter the room, dressed in coats. The first man is blonde, with green eyes, glasses, grey trench coat, and a cross dangling from his neck. The other man is older, with black hair, a mustache, blue coat, and the most striking of all, an eye patch covering his left eye. The two enter the room with monotone expressions as the officers look at them in shock.

"Can we see the body, please, officers? If it's not too much of a problem." Says the eye patched man, with a kind, gentle voice as he gives a warm smile.

_Coming soon…_

All right guys, this will be in fact, the next chapter of the one shot theatre. I want to say first, sorry for the short intro. It was meant to act sorta like a teaser trailer. Secondly, the chapters will in fact be multi-parters, based on this idea I had for a while. To explain first of all, this will be a detective murder story, featuring a lot of fictional characters. The two main detectives are…. (CENSORED) and (CENSORED). Sorry, but the characters will be kept in secret, but if you can identify them from the teaser, you get a cookie. Not really, but you get my point.

And I am now opening up a mini-competition here. There will be a lot of deaths here, so I want to request any of you guys to choose the victims of these grisly murders. There is no limit to the victims you want, but I will only choose a few for these murders ;). So, leave a review and request any fictional characters to be victims, whether they be good guys or bad guys. But I will say the next chapters might cross between T and M territories. Hopefully, I'll keep them as T as possible.

Review away!

-Madness Abe


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